Often in this world and day we expect something to happen “right now!” or overnight, like at a fast food place. We pull up, place the order, drive thru and expect quick service. But we have learned fast is not exactly healthy for us. It takes practice, patience, work, and intent. So often when I have tried something new, I expected the same results. Now, I would recommend staying the course for at least 40 days. I choose 40 as a number for several reasons. It carries with it mystical qualities amongst others. Noah was a drift for 40 days, Jesus walked the desert for 40 days, and the list goes on. 40 is symbolic with an awakening of the inner spirit, and resurrection of self.

For instance many years ago, I had an opportunity to practice this. I was working with an employer that had a guard dog that was 3/4 German Shepherd and 1/4 wolf. He was trained as an attack dog but washed out of the school as uncontrollable. Being trained as a police attack dog, he was trained to go for the crotch of his target.  I was familiar with the dog but kept my distance, and he soon became MY teacher.

One day, I was talking with the project superintendent, and the dog came thru the door with the owner, and instantly launched himself at me, barking, growling, and teeth bared. He ripped my pants open from crotch to knee and left teeth marks along the tear on the left thigh. His teeth were dull, as he liked chewing rocks, so it was not a bad wound. The dog backed up and continued barking as I backed out of the area.

Then a couple of days later, it was a repeat performance. The owner was going to cage him, and instead I suggested that he tie him on a short lead and set up a picnic table just out of the chains reach. My goal was to become trusted by the dog, and to trust him. For the next 40 days, I ate my lunch at that table. I always packed a double lunch. I made 2 sandwiches, packed 2 cookies, and double on the snacks. My wife at the time thought I was a nuts, as she would just stay away from the dog. For the 1st week or two, the dog did more growling and barking than anything. I even made sure I came in on the weekends to maintain the contact. As the days melted away, I moved the table closer and eventually the dog was eating at my feet and allowing me to stroke his back.

Then I unchained him and he would greet me at the door and watch me work.  At break and lunch he would sit beside me at the table and even allow me into his kennel area.

I was just reading online about Shadow Animal Totems and how some are sent into our lives so that we can confront a fear. Several dogs had bitten me when I was a child, and I had developed a fear of large dogs. This dog being my teacher taught me to trust myself, stay the course, to give love and honor to all living creatures. The transformation was awesome to behold in the dog and myself.

And I have a great story to tell my grandchildren also.

All historical thinking involves tinkering with the lenses that shine the light of other days into our lives. ~ Richard F. Snow

We have been invited to a blog hop with the topic, Comparison; The Thief of Joy. We are linking this post  to the Comparison Blog Hop on Dangerous Linda and Everyday Gyaan.

Recently, looking for a picture to post with a quote on my website, I saw my dad standing beside a kayak - my kayak!  Only to realize that it was me, and not dad, I had developed the posture of standing just like him. IF, I had developed that stance, what other stuff was lurking that I was NOT seeing.

Bruce Lipton in his book, Spontaneous Evolution, writes that by the age of six, our unconscious mind and behaviors has already been programmed by our parents, teachers, babysitters, and the stories told us to respond a certain way. Part of that programming is comparing good vs. bad, beautiful vs. ugly, appropriate behavior vs. inappropriate behavior, chaos vs. peace, right vs. wrong, hot vs. cold to name a few common ones. We have been programmed to compare one thing to another from politics to diapers and look for safety in those comparisons with numbers. Kind of like calling in the marines to re-enforce our position, even if it is craziness, the more on our side, the more “right” we are.

We live and die by our stories. And we spend amazing amounts of money and pain/anguish to brand our story, change our story, and live our story. We are a story telling species; of myths with dragons turning into princesses, legends of mighty warriors sailing the seas, of sacred text with wisdom, laws, and stories of its people and journeys, ballads of mighty ships sinking at sea, poems of lost loves, and story tellers retelling their stories along with lacing stories of ancient times.

We are a meaning making species and the meaning we make becomes a part of our culture, belief systems, and life itself. There are winners and losers, of love lost and love won, battles fought and lost. The winners tell their stories because they won, and that story becomes the fabric of their land.  Spin doctors and elephant trainers trail through my mind as I contemplate this.

When a baby elephant is being trained, its leg is tied to a post with a very strong rope. No matter how hard, how often, or how long the baby elephant pulls, it is unable to break free or move the post. It soon learns that the weight of the rope around its leg is an all powerful unmoving force. When the elephant becomes an adult simply placing the rope around its leg causes the elephant to stay in its place as it has resigned itself to the all-powerfulness of the rope. Even though the elephant as an adult can move trees and uproot most any post, the mere weight around the leg secures the elephant in its place and renders it powerless.

Many of our stories have been around for millenniums, containing our truths, our beliefs, and our heritages. Woven into those stories are comparisons of every type known to man/woman. A friend saw the subject line, “Comparison; The Thief of Joy” and her 1^st comment was “Oh… SUCH a sad statement…”

In that light, I might ask, “Which stories and beliefs hold me in place, keeping me unconsciously tethered, dis-empowered, and thwarted from living my joy, my peace?”

And yet, it is not such a sad statement, for in that word “comparison” lies our survival, our sense of urgency, our sense of well being, and our “joy!” Without that comparison, we could not appreciate the moments of joy and sadness in our lives; farmers would not have a sense of urgency to gather in the crops before the storm’ or to seek shelter when the warning sirens blare, or Angie stands on the horn yelling to take cover. Just like Angie, our intuition raises red flags, warnings, while Spirit whispers of wiser choices to be made; the remembering of celebrations, community and joy from those events. Our whole lives are wrought with examples of the good, the bad, and the ugly.  We need to embrace the gifts in both good and the bad rather than choose only one.  For in both are gifts and opportunities to expand our thinking.

Comparison is not a thief of joy; it is a gift of awakening, of being aware, of remembering the possibilities that exist in each of us, the thought of creating a better life for ourselves, our families, and for generations to follow. And in that awakening we find that we are aware of the things that make us come alive, the fire in our bellies, the yearning of our soul to be who we are called to be. To be me and the chance to experience the joys, love, and being alive at this time.

I did a Thesaurus word search on comparison and this is what I found; Comparison means relationship; relationship means bond; bond means friendship; friendship means amity, amity means peace. In that comparing of comparison….we find peace…interesting. Can “joy” be far away?

What is stealing your joy? Maybe, just maybe, it is a ton of work around the house, a mortgage that forces you into a slavery to pay it, fancy cars, keeping up with the neighbors? Maybe downsizing, getting back to the basics, living smaller in harmony with nature is something to consider. Living in a tiny house, small home can give you the freedom to chase your dreams, pursue your passion, or just experience the joy of life.

I asked some close friends what they thought of the quote and here are their thoughts.

“Can you be in this world without comparison? Can you simply be and have no judgment? Comparison is certainly duality, but is duality joy? Joy - Peace - Love - is experience is moment of now - of no future thought - no past thought and no present thought. Any thought - ANY THOUGHT - is a judgment or comparison. Can you have a thought of Love - of Joy? No, only experience.” - Ron

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“Comparison, like many ideas and thought-processes, can be a double-edged sword.
On one hand, we look to people who embody qualities that we wish to embody in a greater way, and this reveals an aspiration within us, desire to experience more of a particular aspect of life. This is all well and good, and moves us towards a more complete experience of life.
Concurrently the act of comparison is accompanied by some underlying beliefs, beliefs that are often unconscious, and that undermine the very desire for more life that has been revealed.
When we say “I want to be like that”, we are also saying, consciously or unconsciously, “I don’t want to be like I am.”
We have lost sight of a much more important idea than comparison, and that is the idea of diversity, which is the nature of creation. We have forgotten that who we are, HOW we are, is exactly what we are created to be. Each person has unique gifts, gifts that cannot and will not be discovered and contributed to the world by trying to be like someone else. They must be discovered, uncovered perhaps, and shared in their own unique, individual way. There has never before been and never again will be the exact compilation of thoughts, ideas, experiences and talents that come together in each individual.
There will always be someone who has more, who is better at certain skills, who weighs less or knows more, but there will never again be another you. It is only by honoring our own individuality, celebrating what we each person brings that we will come to know our own gifts. And it is only by bringing those gifts, each in their own magnificently unique way, which we will create the kind of world that we are seeking to create.” - Rev Jeff

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“I think people can support or contribute to the feeling of “joy”, or they can discount, or discourage something that could reduce the feeling of “joy”, but I don’t have a sense that someone could actually “steal” joy….a feeling…..” - Shari

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“When I compare myself to others I always lose because I am doing my inside to their outside.  I know too much about me, or not enough.  Even when I think I’ve done better than the other guy I lose because I have to stay on top of it all the time and I can’t do that .  There will always be someone who is faster, smarter, better looking richer, cleverer, a better dancer, carpenter, lover, father, husband.  I just can’t win if I compare.”- Leif

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In much of my coaching work I focus on helping people hold two opposing truths in the same consideration. The word “and” is very pivotal to this work. Most of us are habituated into using the word “or” rather than “and”. Something can be both good AND bad. Useful AND not useful, Kind AND cruel. Holding paradox allows us to experience life outside of our limited ideas, opinions, perceptions, biases, etc. Truth changes when viewed in this light. Using the word “AND” broadens our world whereas the word “OR” often contracts it. - Stacy Kamala Waltman

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Taller, younger, thinner, smarter, richer, prettier…
more prestigious college, nicer car, bigger house, better looking husband…
smarter kids or impressive job…
The list could go on and on and on…
Nowadays, I’m so certain and sure…
Happy with what I have and all I am…
So…
There’s no need, really.
To compare.
No…
You be You…
and I’ll be Me…
Both of us, just as happy as we can be.
We are wonderfully and fearfully made. - Glory D

Whistle Stop Tiny Locomotive time for telling of stories

If stories come to you, care for them. And learn to give them away where they are needed. Sometimes a person needs a story more than food to stay alive.
Barry Lopez, in Crow and Weasel

Those who do not have power over the story that dominates their lives, the power to retell it, rethink it, deconstruct it, joke about it, and change it as times change, truly are powerless, because they cannot think new thoughts.
Salman Rushdie

God made man because he loves stories.
Rabbi Nachman of Bratzlev (as quoted by Steve Sanfield)

I was showing a cabin that had a lot of ties to the past recently that involved a road trip. On the way there, coming down into Council Bluffs at 3AM, I hit a brush wolf/coyote. It was dark and it just appeared in front of the bumper in an instant. There was nothing to do, but hear and feel the bumps as it rolled under the truck and hit the cabin. I felt sorry for it and wondered what it would mean metaphysically. And lost track of that thought in the hum of the road until we got to our destination. In backing up the cabin, I saw that there was blood and tissue on the front of the cabin and the right rear wheel hub inside was coated red. No damage to the truck. Interesting and now I was really curious.

That got me to thinking and researching wolf meanings revealed some insights that made sense to me. Wolf comes with a warning that we are stuck in a rut, comfortable and have decided to sit on the sidelines. Wolf also calls us to expand our horizons, seek new adventures, learn a new skill, and put the past behind us.  Wolf is always telling us to seek the teachers and mentors to take our/my life to a new level. Lots of messages there for me!

Another name for a brush wolf is a coyote. And a coyote is a trickster, someone that cannot be trusted. Who will lure you in to spring a trap - to make you a captive. So, hitting the brush wolf/coyote was …well… symbolic of old thoughts and friends that had been part of my life. What this was saying to me was to close the door on the past, and yet be aware that the coyote lives, for it is a trickster and it can do some really comical things. The roadrunner cartoons of the coyote laying traps to catch the roadrunner for dinner to only get himself caught in them is running through my mind as I type this. There are 2 meanings to a coyote; from the front is one coyote meanings and when they approach you from the side, it is a contrary coyote. The one that I hit came from the left side.

This is what the book, “Medicine Cards” says about a contrary coyote.

“IF coyote appears in the reversed position, you can be assured that he is going to be contrary and a pain in your side. If coyote approaches you from the outside, beware of this master of illusion. Coyote may put you under his spell and take you to the brier patch to pick berries. It will be a painful lesson for you if you follow him. Coyote reversed can appear in your life as a supposed all-knowing teacher, a scam artist, a get rick quick business partner/planner, a rare coin door to door salesperson, a femme fatale, a movie producer, a television evangelist, a swamp land dealer, a politician, or anybody who wants you to follow their lead. Coyote is not a recommended business partner or lover.”

The coyote also shows us some of our comic foolishness; Coyote is you, me, booby traps, jet airplanes with toilets that don’t work, blind dates, and all the humorous and whimsical things we encounter along life’s way.

Snooze time is over if you have pulled a coyote medicine card or have a coyote dogging you. Be wary of the coyote and brush wolf, for they are cunning, devious and full of tricks. It pays to keep a fire lit and spirits love in your heart, for once encountered, they are always out there beyond the fire lights, lurking in the darkness thinking no one sees them, while we know their games of cunning. They seek out prey that is weak, and by surviving our encounters with them we become stronger.

A writer’s brain is like a magician’s hat. If you’re going to get anything out of it, you have to put something in it first.
Louis L’Amour

All human beings have an innate need to hear and tell stories and to have a story to live by … religion, whatever else it has done, has provided one of the main ways of meeting this abiding need.
Harvey Cox, The Seduction of the Spirit

Storytelling is the most powerful way to put ideas into the world today.
Robert McKee

The universe is made of stories, not atoms.
Muriel Rukeyser

The picture is from an Alaskan Cruise when we stopped in Sitka for shore leave and tours. I went on a kayaking excursion to a remote bay and found tiny floating houses and this tiny outpost to start our kayaking from. After going through a “training” program, we got the opportunity to paddle around the bay which had 3 floating tiny homes. - Jim

Losing touch with spirit does nothing to the field of creativity, which is beyond harm; but it can do much to damage a person’s chance in life.
Deepak Chopra

The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.
Winston Churchill

Great opportunity is usually disguised as unsolvable problems.
Gretchen G. Clement

An empowered organization is one in which individuals have the knowledge, skill, desire, and opportunity to personally succeed in a way that leads to collective organizational success.
Stephen R. Covey

To awaken each morning with a smile brightening my face; to greet the day with reverence for the opportunities it contains; to approach my work with a clean mind; to hold ever before me, even in the doing of little things, the ultimate purpose toward which I am working; to meet men and women with laughter on my lips and love in my heart; to be gentle, kind, and courteous through all the hours; to approach the night with weariness that ever woos sleep and the joy that comes from work well done - this is how I desire to waste wisely my days.
Thomas Dekker

When nothing is sure, everything is possible.
Margaret Drabble

How could any entrepreneur, confronted by such amazing opportunities to help transform the world and to do so with such extraordinary colleagues, be tempted to lose focus? Especially since the work involves such breadth that the boredom of routine or specialization does not exist.
Bill Drayton

]]> http://www.tinygreencabins.com/Snips/?feed=rss2&p=462 http://www.tinygreencabins.com/Snips/?p=455 http://www.tinygreencabins.com/Snips/?p=455#comments Sun, 13 Nov 2011 14:31:41 +0000 Jim http://www.tinygreencabins.com/Snips/?p=455

Friends…they cherish one another’s hopes. They are kind to one another’s dreams.
Henry David Thoreau

The essence of love is kindness.
Robert Louis Stevenson

Kindness is more than deeds. It is an attitude, an expression, a look, a touch. It is anything that lifts another person.
C. Neil Strait

The reasons for being kind are innumerable.

Here are just a few:

1. Being kind feels good.
2. God smiles on kindness.
3. Kindness broadens our perspective
4. Kindness softens our heart.
5. Kindness brightens our world.
6. Kindness helps people feel respected and less alone.
7. Kindness makes people want to be around us.
8. Kindness bears wonderful fruit.
9. Kindness begets kindness.
10. Your kids will learn from your example.

“And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair.”
Kahlil Gibran

“Be glad of life because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars.”
Henry Van Dyke

“If you aren’t playing well, the game isn’t as much fun. When that happens I tell myself just to go out and play as I did when I was a kid.”
Thomas J. Watson

Fall Colors

Change only favours minds that are diligently looking and preparing for discovery.
Louis Pasteur

It is by logic we prove. It is by intuition we discover.
Henri Poincare

Every door is another passage, another boundary we have to go beyond.
Rumi

Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.
Carl Sagan

A view of the Oregon Coast

“Do more than exist, live. Do more than touch, feel. Do more than look, observe.
Do more than read, absorb. Do more than hear, listen. Do more than think, ponder.
Do more than talk, say something.”
John H. Rhoades

“May you live all the days of your life.”
Jonathan Swift

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: It goes on.”
Robert Frost

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